Best Jokes: Jokabit

  • Friday, July 5th, 2013
Jokabit SJ5. Presentation of the students (02.11.2014.)

The presentation* (and lie**) of the fetus (baby) during pregnancy varies a lot and does not matter unless the woman is in labour and going to deliver. Likewise, the presentation (and lie) of the students towards their teachers varies a lot depending on the attitude of the students and time of the exam when they have to be delivered. The fetus (baby) with a favourable attitude and presentation during labour has a higher chance of delivering normally as it encounters less obstruction and has a lower chance of getting distressed during labour. In contrast, the fetus (baby) with an unfavourable attitude and presentation during labour has a higher chance of not delivering normally as it encounters greater obstruction and has a higher chance of getting distressed during labour. It has a higher chance of being delivered by forceps, ventouse or Caesarean section, and suffering from various complications including disability and death. The situation becomes more complicated in multiple pregnancies with more than one fetus (baby), and the problem is directly proportional to the number of fetuses (babies). The outcome of labour also depends on the place of labour and people involved e.g. the Obstetrician, Midwife, Neonatologist etc. Some babies might need a lot of ‘help’ to survive. The situation is similar in the cases of the students. As the labour is ‘The test’ for the fetus (baby) so the exam for the students.

Presentation* of the fetus (baby) – the leading part of the fetus that presents to the pelvic inlet of the birth canal.  A malpresentation is any presentation other than a vertex presentation (with the top of the head first).

Lie** of the fetus (baby) – the relation between the long axis of the fetus (spine) with the spine of the mother

Presentation of the students

During classes when the exam is not near – Shoulder or Cord (Transverse lie), any (Unstable lie), Breech (extended, flexed or footling) or Cephalic (Face, Brow, Vertex – flexed or deflexed). It becomes complex when one student gangs up with the friend(s) like the situation in multiple pregnancies, the worst being a conjoint twin that cannot be delivered normally whatever the presentation might be.

When the exam approaches – Majority Cephalic (Face, Brow, Vertex – flexed or deflexed), any (Unstable lie)

When the exam is close – Majority Cephalic (Face, Brow, Vertex – flexed or deflexed)

Just before the exam – Majority Face

During exam – Majority Cephalic (Vertex – flexed, chin touching the chest) that has the highest chance of being delivered normally

After failing in the exam – Majority Cephalic (Vertex – flexed, chin touching the chest) irrespective of their presentation and attitude before and during the exam

After passing the exam – Majority Breech

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